just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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