who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
