I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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