you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
