JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize