Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
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