I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
