We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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