is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
