so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
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