I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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