Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
