Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
