So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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