Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
