it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
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