Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
