i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
There's even glitter on my cock...
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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