His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
