last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize