i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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