It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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