there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
