dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
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