they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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