What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
