I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
