Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
