Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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