I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize