Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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