her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
The ass gains better be worth it
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