i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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