Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
