okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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