i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
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