(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
