I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize