Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
It was confusing and full of hummus
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
