in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
i think i scared a bird with my dick
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
