I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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