puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Randomize
