hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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