HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
