She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
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