she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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