I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
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