is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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