guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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