You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
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