I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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