Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Randomize
