She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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