I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
