The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
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we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
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He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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